Sometimes I Hate Writing


As I am writing, my eyes are red, my tears are streaming, and my nose is stuffed. I’m not sick, I’m just writing. Currently, I’m in the middle of writing two pieces: one is whimsical and comedic, the other is melodramatic and sad. When I write, the hardest part for me is the sad monologues that hit close to home. It’s almost like acting. I have to get into character and take myself to a place that hurts me and causes me to pull out all the stops. Obviously, I was just writing the sad piece right now which compelled me to record how I’m feeling right now.

I miss my mother. Through all the hurt and the pain she dragged me through back in January, I hate that I still miss her. I’ve tried so hard to build a wall but sometimes, there are holes and I let myself fall through them. This is so ironic because in order to get myself to write the whimsical piece, I listen to music that puts me in that mood. The laughter and fun just pours out from my mind onto the paper. I guess that’s why I felt the need to write. I needed to pull myself out from this heartbroken character and get back to at least my neutral state. I’m almost there. All day today, I spent it laughing, inspiring myself through experiences and good company, recording everything I want to share someday on stage or on screen.

Just to share a few laughter resources, here are just some places I like to go to in case of emergency lows:

Damn you Autocorrect
Funny Or Die
Fail Blog
Wainy Days

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1 Comment »

  1. […] time I go through my monologue, I change things. And every time I start to read it, I start getting choked up over it. When did I become so emo? Maybe I’ll try to get it on video or something so that I […]


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