Posts Tagged ‘health’

Clean Eats and Jam Out

Have I ever mentioned how wonderful life is? I keep having these amazing moments in my life and I can’t believe all these things are happening. Thursday was a pretty awesome day. First, I wake up, get on the scale, and find out that I finally moved past the 4 lbs that I’ve been yoyoing up and down all month and get into losing the 5th lb. Second, I get an email saying that my favorite band, Finish Ticket, is coming by my house to drop off a vinyl of their album, Tears Your Apart. My HOUSE!!! WHAT??!!! The part that was really cool was that I got an email asking exactly when I’d be home because they said they wanted to deliver it to me specifically when I was there because I had been such a long time loyal fan. *THUD* Third, I found out that I won tickets to a concert at the Great American Music Hall where Seeking Empire, Happy Fangs and New Diplomat were playing! I had interviewed Seeking Empire and New Diplomat a few years ago for a website I was helping out on and they are just such great bands. Seeing them perform Thursday night and for free topped off my night! And then yesterday morning, I got on the scale and I had lost another 2.2 lbs. Whut whuttttt!!!?!!

Here are some pics from Thursday:

Brendan Hoye & Michael Hoye from Finish Ticket

They signed the back but they also wrote on the front!

Seeking Empire

New Diplomat

What a wonderful day. Right now, I’m listening to my new record and some other records, drinking water and roasting veggies. And for the first time, I’m actually really excited about them. I’m roasting potatoes, red bell peppers and colorful carrots which I seasoned with avocado oil, olive oil, lemon juice, black pepper, rosemary, dill, and himalayan pink salt. Can’t wait to taste it! Ever since I saw that pic with me and Will, I just felt heartbroken. However, from that broken heart, I rose from my ashes and decided that this was going to be the last year that I’m overweight. My imagination of how I want to look standing next to him motivates me to get healthy. I’ve actually been pretending I’m in a weight loss challenge with Will. And of course, it super helps that it seems he’s been trying to get healthy too. He posted that he was doing a juice cleanse and there were pics of him obviously going out running or something. Gawd, I’m just jealous by how much weight he’s lost, but I will get there. I promise. And if I ever do get the chance to stand beside him and take a photo again, I’d better look good. I don’t even actually care what he looks like, he’ll always be a beautiful person to me.

So, the things I’ve been doing lately to get healthy is mainly working out and eating clean. I’ve been cooking a lot more and researching about clean eating. I started cooking without sugar and making foods that are good for me. I have a Filipino vegan chef friend, Astig Vegan, who has made lots of vegan foods for me to taste and because of her, I am no longer disgusted by the sound of something being vegan or vegetarian. Last weekend, she taught me through text messages how to make cashew cheese and it turned out delicious!

Blending the cashews
Cashew Cheese
Forming for culturing
Cashew Cheese2
Delicious with lentil chips
Also made gluten free, grain free & sugar free brownies. Sooooo goooood!!

You know, they say…


However, after eating clean for about 3 weeks now, a friend of mine who I see almost every week told me I did look thinner. What?!!! I was shocked. I mean, I did look in the mirror and thought about whether or not there were any changes but I just wasn’t sure since I see myself every day. However, it’s great to know my efforts are actually working. I always used to just give up after 3 weeks because I never felt like anything I was doing would be lasting. Fortunately, I discovered Amelia Freer through Sam Smith’s weight loss story and I’m so grateful! I’m currently reading her book “Eat. Nourish. Glow.” to help me along. I’ve tried low carbs, I’ve tried no carbs, I’ve tried Atkins, Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, South Beach, oh my god. So many phases of hell I’ve put my body through and it finally said to me, “STOP! Just be good to me.”

Amelia Freer writes “Listen to your body. It’s smarter than you.” I completely agree. I’ve actually said these words to friends of mine who were dieting and yet, I never listened to these words myself. I know the body finds ways to tell you what it needs. If your pee is super yellow, it’s telling you you’re not drinking enough water. If you’re craving veggies when you never have before, it’s telling you that it doesn’t have enough nutrients. If you get sleepy in the afternoons, it’s telling you that you’re not getting enough hours of sleep at night or that you’ve had too much sugar. In my previous eating habits, I never listened. I ate based on scent, thoughts, desires, and cost. Today, I eat to nourish my body rather than for convenience. I also cut out a lot of sugar. Amelia says that sugar has been shown in studies to be 8 times more addictive than cocaine!! I did hear that before and I believe it. Whenever a coworker brings sweets to work and I refuse by saying I’m on a diet, their answer is always “Oh please. One is not going to hurt you.” Unfortunately, that’s not true. One WILL hurt you because you’ll get another sugar craving later in the day and you won’t be able to stop thinking about it until you have it and the worst words you can say to yourself on a diet is “I might as well…” No thanks, I’d rather not spiral down that sugar hill, gang. Go on without me.

While typing this, my veggies finished roasting and they smell and taste delicious!



Yummy yummy yummy. I never thought I would enjoy a grain with just veggies but I do. Yeah, there are potatoes but since everything else is healthy and homemade, I’m gonna say that’s ok. I ate this with some bulgur rather than white rice. Tastes great! I feel so proud of myself today. Anyway, have a great rest of the weekend and may everything good happen to you. I love life!!

Celebrate The Body

Celebrate Your Body - Wear Your Voice Magazine

Never in my life did I ever think I would see my picture next to Katy Perry’s on a website. This is a screencap of the Wear Your Voice Magazine that covered the Celebrate Your Body fashion show. This is my 2nd time doing this fashion show and I just wanted to share my thoughts on it. The first time I did it, the fashion show was described as “an alternative fashion + music show that pays homage to the creativity and plurality of the Bay Area.” I remember when I first invited people to come to the show, I described it as “an alternative fashion show” and it made me a bit uncomfortable. As I watched the models walk up and down the runway, I started thinking about how these people were not the alternative at all, they were the majority. My town vomits diversity and at this show, there were plenty of colors, different sizes, big and small personalities all coming together to put on a fashion/music show to an audience that was finally able to relate. So why do we have to be “alternative” when we were the majority?

This year, the show is described as “a one-of-a-kind, body-positive fashion show and expo.” It was definitely a step towards body positivity as all heights, weights, genders, and even physical disabilities were represented. It was such an inspirational show to be a part of and I wish this type of fashion show was more mainstream.

Sports Illustrated took a step forward today and put “plus size” models in their magazine. I’m really glad they started featuring these body positives images. For so many years, the fashion industry has been stuffing skinny bitches in our faces, making the young and impressionable girls feel like there is something wrong with their body if they don’t look a certain way. That type of media can result in body dysmorphic disorder, anorexia, bulimia, depression, self-hate, suicidal tendencies, anxiety, not to mention eating disorders, muscle loss, hair loss, tooth loss, heart failure, dehydration, the list goes on. How do I know this? I know this because I used to be bulimic and I wasn’t even aware of it. I told my mother what I was doing to lose weight and she thought it was a good idea because she didn’t know any better. Now we know better. It took me a long time to recover but I made it out.

I want to live in a world where advertisements & fashion designers want to mimic me rather than improve me. Not sure where designers got so lost along the way. Take a look at how beauty was perceived over the years. Look at the Renaissance era. Women were so voluptuous and curvy back then and that was considered sexy. I would have loved to have been celebrated for being soft and sexy. Today, I feel like advertisements turn towards body shaming and superficial judgement. If you’re fat, you’re lazy. If you’re skinny, you’re a bitch. It’s time we all just step back and take a moment to say to ourselves, “I am beautiful. I am strong. I am enough.”

That’s it. I am enough.

From 2014 To 2015

I have to say, 2014 was quite a year. I’m so happy with all the things that happened and I’m looking forward to what 2015 will bring. For the past 4 years, my New Year’s resolution was the same: “I want to meet Will Friedle‚Ķand lose weight, blah blah blah.” Now that I finally accomplished that goal, I work on the blah blah blah.

Best Things about 2014:

Co-produced two shows that I am very proud of:
Love Edition: Love Bytes

PCCN (Pilipino Counter Cultural Night)

Got interviewed by SF Bay Guardian

Granny Cart Gangstas in SF Bay Guardian

Made a 90s R&B music video parody, inspired by Xscape’s “Understanding” video

Invited by Ben Savage to catch a closed taping of Girl Meets World
GMW Pass

Hung out with Jason Marsden and his friends after his Locker 13 film premiere at a bar
Jason Marsden

Had the best time filming The Love Edition web series, “Bender/Breaker” (Annotations must be turned on)

Finally got to meet my dream husband, Will Friedle
Will Friedle meets Miss Ava

Completed my first short film, Accident and having Jason Marsden tell me he thought it was “really well done” was icing on the cake

Moved into my own place which means I get to buy my own groceries
Farmer's Market Haul

Finally got my song from my favorite band, Finish Ticket! It took a whole year but you can’t rush creativity. The final result is perfect! I’ve included a clip of it on my site. I recently saw them perform at the legendary Fillmore and they covered Weezer and finally performed one of my favorite songs of theirs, Killing Me!

Yes, 2014 was wonderful but life moves forward and so must I. There are soooo….many things I want to do but take baby steps, I shall. Turn my dreams into goals, I will. Not sure why I’m speaking like Yoda but I felt it necessary.

So for 2015, I have little goals I want to achieve and some bigger goals I want to reach for. I say goals instead of dreams because I find that when you turn your dreams into goals, you are more likely to achieve them. Essentially, the word “dream” almost subliminally tells you that it’s not real, that it’s just a fantasy. However, the word “goal” implies a direction, a motivational force so to speak. With that said, my goals for 2015 include the following:

1. Be more girly – I want to buy more dresses and dress more like a girl and yet still be comfortable, but I don’t want to pull a George Costanza and wear sweatpants all day. I want people to know I will NOT give up!

2. Eat vegetables every day – My friend once told me that when you eat, you’re either fighting disease or feeding it. Yes, she obviously cannot accept my incessant love for my self-made ice cream tours in every city but I see her point and will take it into consideration. Are avocados considered a vegetable? It’s green.

3. Cut your portions and consume less meat – I want to eat like a normal person and eat the portion size they eat. Problem is, my mother put me on a diet when I was 12 and I have been dieting ever since. I haven’t the slightest clue what a normal portion is! America has a problem with portion distortion and I’m wallowing in the thick of it all. I also want to eat less meat and lose some weight. I mean, if Will Friedle can do it, so can I.

4. Cut my hair every 4 months – They say that your hair changes every 7 years. I don’t know how true that is but I’ve always felt like my hair grows too slowly so I never cut it. However, when I finally did cut it 4 months ago, I noticed that my hair has grown a lot faster since then so maybe I will spend that $65 and get that amazing haircut I love and just enjoy seeing it grow.

5. Drink more water – I am guilty of not drinking much water unless I have access to it easily but the adult female body is about 55% water on average and I am going to keep drinking until that 55% reaches 75% and my pee is no longer the slightest bit yellow. That’s how I tell when I’m dehydrated. When your pee looks like Mountain Dew, you’d better go get yourself some Aquafina because chances are, you’re probably dying.

6. Produce at least one show this year, two if I have time – So far, I have two shows I am involved in this year. One is a feature length play and the other is a Women’s show for Women’s History Month. I’m excited about both shows because A) I really love the story of the feature length play and B) I really love the theme of the Women show, which is also going to be a comedy show and the theme I came up with is “No Filter.” What do I mean by that? Well, I just wanna explore, what would it be like if we lived in a world where we didn’t have to be polite to each other? What if you didn’t have to tell your friend that her baby was cute? What if she really does look fat in that outfit? Let’s explore this realm, shall we? I’m still debating on a title.

7. Go to Paris & Prague – Haven’t been to Paris since 2001 and I have never been to Prague. When I get to these countries, I am going to create my own food tour. I wanna eat French sushi, buy Huckleberry jam at Maison du Chocolat, and find me some drinking chocolate. I am not familiar with Prague at all so I’m just going to wing it. Who knows? Maybe I’ll fall in love, but first, I’ll have to fall out of love with Will Friedle and make myself available for love. I only have room in here for one at a time.

8. Pay off one of my student loans – I’m sooooo close to killing of one of them! Back in 2011, my student loans totalled around $40K and today, they are less than $10K. I think that’s pretty awesome. I can’t wait to pay all of it off. And when I do, it will be the same as when I paid off my car. I’m going to celebrate!

9. Take more risks – Life is short, life is a gift, life is supposed to be lived, enjoyed, cherished. I have spent wayyyyy too much time worrying about the negative. Perhaps if I thought more positively, my world would just start to get better and better. Oh who am I kidding, with all these amazing experiences I’ve had the past few years, I’d say I’ve already taken plenty of risks and have been able to accomplish a LOT! Keep it up though, keep it up.

10. Stop condemning my body and start celebrating it – Instead of complaining about what I don’t have, comparing myself to others and feeling bad about myself, I’m going to celebrate the things I do have, the parts I love about myself and all the things my body has allowed me to do. Walking, running, seeing, dancing, exercising, all these things should be celebrated.

I am making a promise to myself to live life as if every day is the last day. Take chances, make changes and enjoy everything life has to offer. All these positive adventures have far outweighed the negative experiences I’ve been through. I am so thankful for it all. This is my last post for 2014. It’s been a wild ride. Be safe, take care, and may 2015 be even better. Good night…

Detox Day 4

I made a date with my bff to watch Titanic in 3D yesterday. So naturally, we had to have dinner somewhere and I chose to go to a Thai restaurant. Initially, I was planning on going mediterranean because I thought I could just have hummus. However, I realized they weren’t going to have a bag of baby carrots for me to dip & I wasn’t about to eat their pita bread that I’m not allowed to have. Therefore, thai was a better solution. I ended up at Summer Summer Thai. Scoping through the menu proved to be difficult to find something that fit along my diet guidelines. Finally, I decided on the Flambe Chicken, which was “Grilled marinated chicken in our secret Thai spices.”

I tore that chicken UP! I ate it kamayan style (with my hands) and it was soooooo goooood. I LOVE this diet! I didn’t eat the sauce though but I did try it. It mostly had lots of sugar so I had to pass. My next challenge will be when I head off to the next film shoot & I have to figure out a way to maintain my diet on set. I was thinking of eating beforehand. If I have to, I’ll just boil some eggs & brown bag it. Oooh, good idea. Soft-boiled eggs are my absolute favorite! 8 minutes in simmering water is all your need.

Gluten-Free Corn flakes (Nature’s Path)
Rice milk (Rice Dream)


Scrambled eggs with fuzzy melon
Brown rice
Green tea with roasted brown rice (Yamamotoyama)

Grilled chicken (Summer Summer Thai restaurant)
Brown rice

Weight lost since 4/2/12: 4.8 lbs.

Detox Day 2

I didn’t really have time to think of anything new to eat so I pretty much ate the same thing as Day 1. The only difference is my dinner. I ended up going to a meeting last night where the host had purchased some delicious-looking & heaven-scented appetizers that made me drool. Stuffed mushrooms, shanghai lumpia & bacon stuffed potato wedges were on their menu. The only way I could get through it was by drinking water & telling myself it’s just not worth it.

So far, in the last 2 days, I’ve lost 2 lbs. Not really a pound a day though. After Day 1, I had lost .4 oz. After Day 2 was when I had gotten up to 2 lbs. I can’t even imagine what would have happened if I had given into temptation & had taken a bite of those appetizers. Oh the horror! I can already imagine what would have transpired if I had taken a bite. It would just be one after another, to the point of no return. It would eventually become a pertual junk food consumption that would propel me into a 24 hour grocery store to buy ice cream, chips & chocolate, spiraling me into the depths of yo yo dieting and leaning on the excuse that the diet can restart tomorrow. Well no more excuses this time. This time, I WON! I didn’t give in, I didn’t take any bites, and I didn’t care. SUCCESS!!

Crispy gluten free brown rice cereal (Erewhon)
Lowfat Goat milk (Meyenberg)


Scrambled eggs
2 slices gluten free whole grain toast (Udi’s)

Gluten-free Brown rice tortilla (Trader Joe’s)
1 oz goat cheese (Trader Joe’s)
Oven roast turkey breast (Trader Joe’s)

The tortillas were awful, might be better if I heated them up.

Detox Day 1

I promised myself I’d writen down everything I ate during this 21 day detox for documentary and disciplinary reasons so here goes.

Day 1: Monday

Crispy gluten free brown rice cereal (Erewhon)
Lowfat Goat milk (Meyenberg)


Scrambled eggs
2 slices gluten free whole grain toast (Udi’s)

Rotisserie (Costco)

I know, not very exciting but I don’t know too many diets that are. I fell asleep at 7 PM and woke up at 3 AM, went back to sleep and woke up again at 6:15 AM to get to work. However, this unusually long sleep was due to a film shoot that lasted until 3:30 AM on Sunday night and I wound up crawling into bed at 4:30 AM only to wake up at 6:00 AM Monday morning. I was a zombie at work…no. Worse, I was a zombie on sleep medication. Couldn’t function properly. I’m surprised I drove home ok. Must have been the excitement of going to Rainbow Grocery, a specialty grocery co-op that carries anything for any special diet you can think of. They have a section dedicated to gluten-free products. I love it. I was actually planning on having gluten-free pancakes for dinner but changed my mind. My exhaustion took over and cooking was not within my strength.

That’s actually rare for me to say. I usually LOOOOVE cooking. Over the years, I’ve grown to enjoy testing out new recipes and discovering which recipes are best for my favorites. For example, I searched high & low for a good Pad Thai recipe and after 10 years, I finally found one that sounded even remotely decent to fit my tastebuds. I tested it out and it was the best pad thai I had ever had in any restaurant! This was the first time I had ever made pad thai and it turned out fantastic. I love it when that happens. Too bad I won’t be able to have pad thai for awhile. 3 weeks is not that long, but it’s perpetual hell when you’re dieting. However, the theme fits because all I want to do is burn. Have a great day!

Scripts & Jewels

I’ve never written a script for a promotional video before. However, tonight, I can say that I have. Not really sure I knew what I was doing but I dove right in because it was an emergency and we needed the script right away. Hopefully, I wrote it right. I don’t care if they want to tweak it. I fulfilled my assignment and put forth my best effort. I just wish I had learned how to write a shooting script instead of only a spec script. I guess I’ll leave it up to the director to figure it out. The thing is, I have this vision in my head of what the video could look like, but translating the visions into words and shots is much more difficult than I ever thought it would be. Even communicating my vision through voice is much easier than putting it into words. I like the challenge though, keeps me on my toes.

Speaking of challenges, I have been out of commission for a week now due to lower back pain. I finally saw my doctor yesterday and she gave me plenty of drugs to keep me comfortable, which is why I am able to write today. She said it’s probably a pinched nerve. It was so annoying to use my computer sideways so typing was purposely neglected. Now I can finally get back to my regularly scheduled programming. One thing I learned from this experience is to never take your health for granted. Sometimes, I feel invincible but deep down, I know I’m not. We, as humans, are all fragile, not matter how much strength we possess. I could strengthen my core, I could work out until I can carry a horse, I could have legs & buttocks as hard as a rock but all could be gone if I get in a car accident. Our bodies only have one life. It’s not easy to bounce back from trauma. It’s just best to take care of it while we can.

On a lighter note, I’ve discovered an interest in jewelry making. I had a vision of a piece of jewelry and haven’t found anyone who has made it. So, I thought, “Why don’t I make it myself?” This was one thing I did with my time away from work. Wouldn’t it be great to be a writer and also sell jewelry on the side, travelling to different places to different jewelry fairs, conventions, trade shows? Maybe it doesn’t sound that strange but keep in mind that I’m a girl who has never ever been into decorating herself. So jewelry has always been the last on my list when it comes to dressing up. Most times, I forget about jewelry and leave the house without it so I keep emergency jewelry in my bag just for that reason. I am going to take a class, borrow some books from the library, and see what I can come up with. I’ve seen a lot of fugly jewelry out there and if they can make money, so can I. My taste dances along the lines of romance, rock n roll, and sparkle. Once I master my craft, I think I’ll make a channel on Etsy. I tried making a simple pair of earrings yesterdays and it was fun to make. I actually wore them and realized they look like earrings I’ve seen being sold for around $5 – $8 a pair. They’re not perfect but hey, they’re my first pair. Yeah, I think I could do this. I wonder what I should name my new business.

Ruby Hearts & Gunmetal

Snitch in Love

3 Notations

1. I am dumbfounded, floored, shocked beyond belief. My boss approved my vacation days so I don’t have to worry about not being able to see Paulo!! Yes, I was going to quit as a last resort but in the end, I know I would have regretted that.

Sigh…what a relief. Now, all I can think about is dieting & what I’m going to wear. Which brings me to my second change-my diet.

2. A friend of mine recently tried a diet I actually have never heard of. I would write it on here but since I’m in a competition with my BFF for weight loss, I’d rather not expose myself until I find out that it actually works for me. It sounds a bit gimmicky because it declares rapid weight loss but if you read all the reviews, how it works, and success stories, it sounds pretty legit! I know my fat, diet-obsessed ass has said to have tried it all but this one, I seriously have never heard of and have high hopes for it because I really want to wear something nice when I go see Paulo. I honestly can not stop thinking about it. I CAN’T!! I’ve even fantasized about a Q&A session where I get to ask Paulo if he would still consider participating in low-budget independent film projects, something I might embark on in the future-which brings me to my next note-screenwriting.

3. I was at the bookstore last night and while looking for another monologue book, I came across a screenwriting section. I started flipping through the books and reading up on the world of screenwriting. I don’t know why I hadn’t thought of this but I really love writing scripts. Perhaps there may be a place for me in this world after all. We shall see. :0)

P.S. Wasn’t it nice that I didn’t mention anything about some crazy new crush? I must be too distracted.